May 28, 2012

I would like to start this blog today by giving a shout out to my young life girls: Catherine Wright, Alyssa Harrington, Jillian Walsh, and April Peyton who are all graduating from High School on Saturday.  Good work girls, I’m very happy for you and excited for the next adventure of college!!!!

While I’m giving shout outs….

Happy Birthday Tina Tootell!  Really couldn’t be happier to have a sister like you and am so excited for you and Ryan to be new parents soon!!!  I’m anticipating some incredible stories. J

Congrats to my sister and brother-in-law who found out they are having another daughter in October!!! 

Lastly, a shout out to Austin, who doesn’t have to do anything or produce children and you are still AMAZING!!! 

Well my friends, I will be back in the states July 12!!!!  YEA!!!!!  Tentatively, I will be state-side for roughly 2 months and then back to South Africa until December (ish).  I think you all know me well enough to know the plans tend to change, but this is what it’s looking like so far.  It blows my mind to think I have been here over 8 months already, but I am excited to get home and throw my arms around all you beautiful people. J 

The next 6 weeks before I leave is HECTIC to say the least.  Let’s see if I can paint you a good picture…

This weekend I, with the help of the ladies I work with, am in charge of organizing an all day “market” selling clothes, shoes, bags, jewelry and accessories which were donated by a distribution company.  All the proceeds are going to the charities/projects LCF is partnered with.  It doesn’t seem like a big deal until you realize there are 3 rooms FULL of stuff that must be sorted, organized and sold.  Immediately after that is over I’ll jump in my car and drive to Klerksdorp to go to my sister’s baby shower on Sunday. 

The next event is two weeks later on June 16, we are organizing a banquet called Business with a Purpose (www.bwap.co.za).  LCF has some really great relationships with a couple businessmen and women.  One particular business decided that instead of giving donations to charities and not knowing if the charities are being good stewards of their resources, they would donate to LCF and let us channel that money out to different charities while building relationships with them.  One thing this business asked is that we would use some of their donation to organize this even –business with a purpose – in order to inspire other business people to get involved in the community.  This is the project that takes up most of my time as it is a high-end event for about 250 guests.  It should be a really great night.  We’ve had a great response and lots of enthusiasm.

A week later I’ll be headed to Pretoria, South Africa for a 3-day event called Moving Into Action - MIA (www.mia2012.co.za).  I think I’ve already mentioned this so I won’t explain too much about it.  It’s a mission/outreached focused training and launching.  People from all over will come together for this 3-day event, then be sent out all over southern Africa to serve in different capacities.  I’m really looking forward to this, especially because I’m taking 4 of the kids from Polokong with and my friend Jared from Missoula is coming to attend the event. 

Three days after MIA is over, our kids’ camp called Kids’Games start.  Kids’Games is an international program/curriculum focused on evangelism through sports and games for kids ages 6-14.  I am in charge of organizing the Bible Program for the week.  It’s going to be really fun; I’m actually really looking forward to it, assuming I get a little bit of time in the next couple weeks to plan some of it. J  Thankfully Jared will still be here and I volunteered him to be one of our program characters (you know you’re excited Jared, don’t lie ;) ).

Five days after Kids’Games end I get on the plane to come home!  To be totally honest, I’m a bit torn.  I’m very, very excited to come home; to see everyone, be in Montana, be in warm weather (it’s COLD here), etc.  But I am sad to leave my sister and family here and I’ve developed some great friendships.  Along with that, the time I have had here to be alone with the Lord has been so incredibly rich.  While I know it’s not a once in a lifetime deal, I am so grateful for the time the Lord has given me with Him and in a weird way it feels like I’m moving on from here.  I realize this is a good thing…getting time with the Lord, growing and moving forward and everything; but, if I can say it, this has been some of the most precious time I’ve had in my life and in a way I’m not quite ready to move on.  I am blessed to say I have great things to look forward to, but mostly I am thankful for right now… I hope you are too. 

I can’t say enough how blessed I am to have you in my life.  Thank you.

Most the people I work with celebrating Isaak's birthday

Some of my best friends here in South Africa!

I’ve been staring at my computer screen for the last few minutes wondering how in the world to get the jumble in my head onto this “paper.”  Recollections of the last month (and then some) mixed with the emotion of gratitude, awe and love are cramming my brainwaves…(sigh)…(deep breath)…

The many friends and family who have had the opportunity to visit South Africa will testify that there is something unexplainable to life here.  From the outside my life is fairly unexciting… J Most days I spend the morning in the office, often times running off to meet with a community partner, kids at a high school, business people to plan upcoming events or attending a church function.  The part of life we can’t see from the outside is the beautiful and extraordinary event that takes place every time the Holy Spirit speaks to us.  In the quiet of my apartment, through a scripture He brings to mind, through the joy of kids receiving their first Bible, through the dawning of a new day or the brilliance of a sunset the Lord has faithfully spoken to me.  The voice, often the whisper, of the Holy Spirit reminding me that I am His, reminding me of His love for me, makes my everyday life extraordinary.  It’s not that I couldn’t hear Him back home, but I believe the Lord wanted to get me alone with Him to know Him in a deeper way.  There is a spiritual depth I experience here in South Africa that I haven’t experienced in the states (yet), which brings me to my knees in humble adoration for the love and life the Lord has given me…the gratitude, awe and love I spoke of is rooted out of this depth of relationship, that which I cannot explain to you, but pray you may experience it for yourself. 

There is simply not enough time and space (and it would probably bore you) to tell you about everything I’m doing and what the Lord has been showing me.  So again, here are some highlights…

The Living Water Project…

A friend of ours who owns a water distribution store donated 5,000 5-liter jugs of water to be distributed in and around Klerksdorp (where Kjelsi lives).  About 100 volunteers took two days to load the water onto trucks and trailers and then distribute the water to a handful of different destinations that had been pre-arranged.  My group took about 600 jugs to a township.  We were put in contact with a local pastor who told us where to pull over (literally) and start handing out the water.  On each jug had a sticker explaining that Jesus is the Living Water.  As people received the jugs of water we also had the opportunity to share Christ with them.  So far, this was one of my favorite day because I love being in the township and I love being able to bless the people there with a necessity, even more so when it simply is coming out of the love of Christ.

Polokong…

I believe I have mentioned it already, but Polokong is the orphanage and community center I volunteer at once/week.  The kids I do leadership development with are simply amazing.  They have an eagerness to grow, servant hearts and a deep desire to know the Lord.  Last week God told me to start talking about courage with them and encouraging them to be agents of change in their communities.  It was such an incredible time with them.  They soaked it all in.   A friend of mine donated some money to me so I went and bought the kids Bibles…I have never been so blessed by giving something to someone before.  They were really excited.  One boy, Jacob said, “YEA!!  I can preach now!!!!”  I guarantee you he has given at least one sermon this week.  J

Worship…

My friend Rene and I organized a multi-cultural worship night at the end of March at a church in the township.  It was amazing!!!  We worshiped God in at least 3 different languages; our group compromised of at least 4 ethnicities and at least 5 different churches.  We serve a God of the nations, how awesome to come together and worship Him as one body!

Of course it was a highlight to have my dad come for a few days on his way back to Mozambique and for my boyfriend (yes people I have a boyfriend, you can all praise God! J ) to come visit for a week.  Now I look forward to my mom coming next week again.  I hope you never feel sorry for me that I’m “all the way in Africa by myself”…that’s just a flat out lie. J  I leave you with a short paragraph I wrote in my journal last month…just something to think about.  Love you all!

“Today was an amazing day.  On one hand I was blessed like a spoiled daughter of the King and on the other hand I was confronted with the reality of such darkness and evil in the world.  I live in a world of evil and yet experience the world/kingdom of love and light.  How they constantly conflict in this broken world.  I wonder why it is that there is so much conflict when the light has already won.  How has the enemy been able to preoccupy, manipulate and deceive God’s people to the point of us not realizing and missing the power and authority we have in Christ thru the Holy Spirit?  … do we have the smallest clue about what life could be?  I feel like we are so far from what we could live in…God’s Kingdom here on earth.  Do we even know what living in His kingdom looks like? Really?”

Spoiled....

I just logged onto my blog and realized I haven't posted anything in over a month...sorry!  My excuse is that the hard drive on my computer died and getting electronics fixed in Africa isn't exactly an overnight process. After a month and a half I finally got my computer back.  I am just amazed at the different ways God provides...

When I first took my computer in they said I had it covered under warranty...the thing is, I am 99% sure I do not have warranty as it is already expired and I did not purchase the extended warranty.  I told them that and they said if I bring in a proof of purchase I could get it covered.  The problem is my proof of purchase is in the states (not exactly sure where) and I couldn't get it here.  After that convo I just assumed I was going to have to pay.  Last week when they called to tell me my computer was ready to picked up, I asked how much it was going to cost and they said I didn't have to pay because it was covered under warranty (yes, still the warranty that doesn't exist).  I told them I didn't have my proof of purchase and they said, "well we looked it up and apple already approved it" !!!!!  On top of not having to pay about $400.00 to get it fixed, they were able to recover ALL of my data and upgraded my hard drive in the process!  The thing about God is He doesn't just give you what you need...He gives you what you need and so much more, even in the small things.

The last few weeks have been incredible!  I can't begin to share all that I have experienced and all the Lord has taught me in this blog.  Here are some highlights....

  Jesus Culture conference that was an amazing night!!!!  On top of awesome worship and teachings, God healed my asthma!!!!!

Siyabonga and Uli at Jesus Culture!

 Hanging out with kids at Polokong, an orphanage where I lead a leadership group

Bender and Siya at the June Nichols school...a school for kids with physical and mental disabilities.  This  is a school LCF is in partnership with and Bender volunteered there 3 days a week while she was here.

I went to an art exhibit this last weekend...the exhibit was on the Psalms.  This is Psalm 8...go read it then look closely at the picture, pretty sweet.

We received a 81 box donation of clothes, shoes, bags, jewelry, etc.  It's all being distributed and some of it sold for money to go to charity.

God blessing me with a beautiful sunset...HE is more faithful than the rising or setting sun!

 Food parcels given out to needy families.  Every month about 185 food parcels are put together and given or delivered to families in the area.

One of the ladies that help out at the food distribution.  She and some other ladies feed a handful of kids everyday for lunch.  The ladies pay out of their own pocket to feed these kids daily...everyday heros.

Bender and I enjoying our last night together!  Great to have her here for awhile.


Praying you are still blessed!

The New Norm

It's been over 2 weeks since Zach and Dan went back home, which would normally mean I'm officially on my own getting used to life without other Americans around on a daily basis (with the exception of my sister who I see every couple weeks), fortunately, my life is anything but normal.  Lauren Bender, another Alpha Omega House friend, arrived in South Africa January 12, spent the first 2 weeks here with Dan and Zach and has been staying with me since they left. She has another 2 weeks until she goes back to the states.  As I think about all the friends and family who have come and gone over the past few months I am simply blown away.  What a blessed and charmed existence I lead that people would come all the way to South Africa just to visit (for as little as 5 days) while I'm here?  I guess I like to pretend the only reason they are coming is for me, but maybe the location was somewhat enticing.  Either way, I feel like I'm the one who lucks out so I have to give a shout out to all those who have come and those who are still coming... THANK YOU, you guys are amazing, I'm so thankful for each of you!!!!

So, life from the 9-5...It's a lot more administrative than I thought it would be, but I'm finding more ways to get involved in the community.  The things I am working on through LCF are  purposeful and good.  I'm grateful to do "work" that is purposeful, focused on the Truths I understand in the world and aimed at the Kingdom of God.

Lauren and I started volunteering at an orphanage called Polokong in one of the townships here.  Polokong is home to 50 kids and also serves as a community center providing a number of different services, but their main one being a feeding program that feeds anywhere from 300-700 people/DAY!  Lauren leads a life-skills and team building group with 9-14 year olds once a week, and I lead a leadership development group with a handful of the high school kids (big surprise :) ) once a week.  Even though we have only been doing this for 2 weeks, I have to say, it is quickly becoming my favorite part of the week.  Not to make all you/us Americans feel stupid, but in talking with the high schoolers yesterday I found out that they all speak 3-8 languages...it took me the entire hour and a half I was with them to learn 1 word in Tsuana....oh Lord, help!

I don't know what it is, but I love being in the township...I know there is a lot of brokenness, it is a hard way of life; but there is something simple and beautiful to me that I can't really explain.  Of all the places I've been to in South Africa I would most want to spend my time just being in the townships.  

I just read an article called "A Common Grace for the Common Good" by Steve Garber.  He basically says the life we live - our wholistic life; the all encompassing life that includes our work, relationships, faith, social, etc - should be a seamless integration of faith for the purpose of producing a "common grace for the common good." Everywhere in life we see common graces, the "little" things in life that bring forth a piece of the joy and light of Christ.  These gifts of grace are both engraved in creation and produced by Christ in us as we live out who Christ made us to be living out the calling He has put in us to do.

I wish I could say that everyday here I am appreciative and thankful for the graces all around me, my experiences and everything I am doing.  I strive for that, but am not quite there.  I pray that in everything I could both see and add to the "common graces" that are all around (even in the midst of a lot of brokenness) for the "common good."  To appreciate the blue sky, the birds chirping, the flowers, the uniqueness and God-image of every person; and to live, whether it's being with friends, grocery shopping, working or sending an e-mail, with the love and light of Christ.

staying afloat and loving it...

I have been fortunate…spoiled really, by the ability to have family and friends here in SA for Christmas and the “holiday season.”  To be totally honest, it has been a lot of relaxing and non-scheduled, no-responsibility time.  The week before Christmas I had two close friends, both who are stationed over-seas with the military, come visit for a few days.  We were able to have some good fellowship together as well as spend some of our time volunteering at a couple different charities.  After the new year, Austin, Zach, Dan, my dad and I enjoyed a 3 day excursion to Kruger National Park where we enjoyed lots of different wildlife and beautiful scenery. 

I have just again begun working (yes South Africa take an entire month to chill out over Christmas).  Here’s what my “job” looks like: building relationships with the three charities LCF supports to serve them and help them become self-sustaining; expand the charities LCF works with; help organize three different events – a fund-raising banquet, MIA (a mission event and commissioning of hundreds of volunteers) and a week long evangelical sports camp; and in my spare time coach a boys basketball team in Klerksdorp (and maybe help with a couple teams in the township). 

It has been more of a blessing than I can tell you to have most of my family here, but unfortunately they can’t stay forever.  My mom and dad went back home on the 12^th and my brother will soon follow on the 24^th of January.

Driving mom and dad to the airport to fly back home I had the moment of panic; the moment where you realize that you are being left to “tread the water by yourself.”  Not only by yourself, but in a foreign country without knowing for how long you will be treading the water or how.  The best way I know to describe how I felt is the feeling you get when you fall waterskiing, wakeboarding or tubing and for a split second all you see is the boat flying away from you as you sit in the vastness of open water by yourself. 

Anyone who has fallen off anything behind a boat knows what I’m talking about.  The minute you make it to the surface after falling, the first thing you look for is the boat that seconds ago was your lifeline; that which was the source of your great adventure, but more than that, your ability to stand above the water.  In a split second your lifeline is gone, driving off into the abyss (or so it seems) without you.  Not only does the boat move forward, but you are left alone, floating in a body of open water with only the lifejacket you wear to keep you afloat in a bit of a panic wondering what is below you that could pull you under, and wanting to frantically swim back to the boat, knowing full well you could never catch it. 

For a moment as I was driving, I felt like I was about to fall off the boat, knowing full well the loneliness, fear and panic that immediately follows detachment. 

The loneliness that there’s no one else there; that some journeys in life I have to walk myself.  In order to get where God has me going, sometimes I have to tread the water without anyone beside me; no one to hold me up.  Just me.  Yet, me in a lifejacket, the very device purposed to keep me afloat when nothing else is there to hold on to; the lifejacket that I don’t have to hold, but it holds me.   

Commence fear…the fear of all that is unknown lying just under the surface.  The things that could overwhelm and overtake me; the questions, the things that are too big for me to handle, the unforeseen events, the what if’s, how’s and why’s all converging in my mind at once to create the panic. 

In the moment of panic a flood of thoughts and emotions, ‘what was I thinking moving to Africa…so far away?’; ‘how am I going to do this?’; and the big one: ‘what do I do now?’. 

Of course the reality that the boat isn’t leaving forever and that your lifejacket really is all you need, calms the fear and panic.  Breathing returns as a secondary function, and you remember the ride you were just taken on, and the one you will soon again embark on, are worth the moments of panic.  Confidence arises, perhaps not in your ability to get out of the water, but in the lifejacket to hold you up and in the lifeline to return and pull you up out of the water on another ride, not the same ride, but an adventure nonetheless.      

I feel like my life is almost entirely one big question mark; like I’m trying to reach the bottom of the lake in order to stand up, but I just keep kicking and treading water because I can’t quite reach.  In the few moments when I get really homesick the reality of the many unknowns can be very overwhelming bringing both fear and a bit of panic.  Most the time I can shrug my shoulders and have peace just knowing God is my lifeline and He’s driving the boat.  Trust God; have faith…It is the only thing I know to do in order to enjoy the ride and take it all in.  This ability is only by the grace of God, believe me…I want to know; but, through God’s grace there is faith and that affords me the freedom to live…even in the unknown. 

There is simply too much divine beauty, wonder and love in a day to miss a single one.  I was reminded of this after reading my friend Jason Greer’s book, “Very Much Better” (if you haven’t read it, please do yourself a favor, go buy and read it).  It is his story of life with cancer as an 11-12 year old boy.  I’ll leave you with this quote from his book:

“A real encounter with faith is like the first gasp after a lifetime of restrained breath, the beginning of a divine respiration that awakens the senses to an all-new passion of skin and heart, thought, and desire.  Faith is the craving for profound experience.”       

Ok people…go live the day!...by faith, trusting God, love outside yourself and ENJOY the beauty and wonder that surrounds every minute of your day.  Love you!

My cup overflows...

One of the first weeks I was in SA, I was giving Siya a bath.  He put my hands together, cupped like a bowl, and took a toy flower waterer he has, filled it with water and poured it into my hands until it was overflowing.  When it started overflowing he would look at me with a BIG smile and laugh.  I put my hands down and he said, ‘No, No’ and put them back together, filled up his waterer and did it again.  He did it over and over.  Whenever the water in my hands would get low or run out he would pour more water in until it was overflowing.  The thing that struck me is how much he enjoyed filling my hands with water.  It was a delight to him. 

            As I was sitting there watching him, God showed me that this is the picture of what God delights to do for me.  He puts me in a position to receive, and then He overflows my life; He blesses me over and over satisfying the deepest desires and needs of my heart, providing me with EVERY physical need, loving me unconditionally with a reckless abandonment I can’t conceive.  And He does it with such delight.  He showed me how much joy He gets from filling me…I don’t have to fear or feel guilty to receiving…I can just receive and enjoy.     

            I’m humbled and grateful to experience this fulfillment and delight on a regular basis; it seems to be the theme of my life lately.  It’s only appropriate to leave you with this…

            

“Sing joyfully to the Lord, you righteous; it is fitting for the upright to praise him.  Praise the Lord with the harp; make music to him on the ten-stringed lyre.  Sing to him a new song; play skillfully, and shout for joy.  For the word of the Lord is right and true; he is faithful in all he does.  The Lord loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love.  By the word of the Lord the heavens were made, their starry host by the breath of his mouth.  He gathers the waters of the sea into jars; he puts the deep into storehouses.  Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the people of the world revere him.  For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded and it stood firm.”  (psalm 33:1-9)

“Whom have I in heaven but you and earth has nothing I desire but you.   My heart and flesh fail, but God is the strength of my life and my portion forever.” (psalm 73: 25-26) 

            

Playing with kids at Sukasambe, a physically and mentally disabled children's home.  

Praise God for all his provisions!  He is and has been and continues to be abundantly faithful to me.

I have been bouncing around quite a bit this month.  I thought I would only be in Vanderbijlpark, but after Siyabonga got sick with pneumonia and a lung infection that landed him in the hospital I went to Klerksdorp for a week to help Kjelsi and Uli with the kids.  Kjelsi and I both ended up getting sick as well that week…lets just say it was a really long week, I’m thankful I could be here to help out, and everyone is doing well and back to health.  Praise God!

Thank you to everyone who prayed for a car…not only did I find a car to buy, but God decided to bless me with it for FREE!!!!!!  An incredible friend gave the car I was going to buy to Siyabonga.  Since he is two, and a few years from driving, my sister and Uli are letting me drive it while I’m here.  Yes, God is faithful and provides every need!!  Don’t be jealous but it’s a 1986 BMW…it’s a sweet ride. J

The guy who owned the car has been living in Cape Town and moved from the country, so I HAD to go to Cape Town to get the car.  Because Zach and Dan came back early from Mozambique the three of us flew down to Cape Town, spent the week down there and road tripped across South Africa with another friend to bring the car back.  I’m not going to tell you a lot about Cape Town, I’ll let the pictures speak for themselves and suffice it to say, Cape Town stands as my second favorite place on the earth (that I’ve been to)…incredibly beautiful, lively, diverse and fun.

LCF received a very large donation with the idea that LCF would be able to channel the resources to charities and be able to build relationship with them in order to help them function better.  I will be one of two or three people in LCF primarily responsible for building relationship with these different charities to: a) determine how well they are currently functioning; b) make sure the money and/or resources they receive are being used properly; and c) help determine weak areas in their organization and help them grow in order to function better.   I’m really excited about this opportunity.  I have a lot of learning to do, but am grateful to be able to work with different organizations in this capacity.  I feel very inadequate, but I also am confident that the Lord is walking me thru this and will give me the wisdom, discernment and compassion I need. 

PRAYER REQUESTS…. Praise God for providing my family, friends and myself with health; for providing me with a car; and for His grace that allows us to be apart of His family.  Pray that my time will be protected.; it seems to escape me before I had it to spend.  Pray that the Lord’s vision and desires would be made clear to me.

And you?...What can I be praying about for you?  Please let me know, I would really love to be praying for you.

I really am doing well..  I finally feel somewhat settled and even established here.  I am happy to be and grateful for that. 

I love you guys,

Linds

My new car!!! Complete with sunroof.  Yes we already drove it 14 hours across South Africa...runs like a champ!

Dan and Zach hidden in a sea of children at the promise center in Mozambique...It's almost like Where's Waldo? but WAY easier

Both the boys usually become a human jungle gym as soon as we are with any kids...exhibit A... 

Killing giant spiders that try and take over your house in Moz...don't mess

Zach and Mamma Tootell on their way to Inhaca Island, Moz

Getting to the actual island requires carrying your luggage and wading thru the sea 

SNORKELING!!!

South African sunset

The GIANT waterfall we hiked to after being reunited in South Africa....Shuuuurrraaaa!!

Leaving for Cape Town...Lindsay's luggage (on bottom) vs. 2 BOYS' luggage (on top)....WINNER!!!!!

First trip to McDonalds in 2 whole months...true happiness!

One of the many beautiful views in Cape Town...no words required

Scorpion we saw on one of our hikes

Zach, Dan and our friend Adam loving life

Open Happiness....

Zach and Dan's favorite pastime no matter where we are

Winery we biked thru in Stellenbauch

Cheers!

Thanksgiving = surfing

Enjoying Ethiopian Thanksgiving dinner with our Cape Town friends

Jealousy? 

JEALOUSY? 

"Dan, I want to punch that face off of you." -Zach-

Best milkshake EVER!!!!!

End of our Cape Town trip!